Live the Day Like It's Your Last
by Foot Tapper
Summary: A scene which could have taken place during 'Not Fade Away' before the battle with the Circle of the Black Thorn. Buffy and Angel together again?


**LIVE THE DAY LIKE IT'S YOUR LAST**

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel: the Series  
Pairing: Buffy and Angel  
Rating: T

Betaed by: Helygen and menomegirl – thank you both, I couldn't have done it without you!

Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me – I'm just borrowing them!

Summary: A missing scene before the battle against the Circle of the Black Thorn

_Angel: "I want you all to do something for me, for yourselves. Take the day off."_

_Spike: "What?"_

_Gunn: "Angel, if we're planning to assassinate the power elite of the apocalypse tonight, shouldn't we be cowboying up?"_

_Angel: " We'll be ready, but today, I want you guys to go out. Live. Do whatever you want. Live the day like it's your last... 'cause it probably is."_

_- Not Fade Away_

Angel had returned to his apartment feeling weary. Seeing Connor earlier had shaken his resolve to take down the Circle of the Black Thorn and he needed to recharge his batteries, focus on what was at stake. Now that Connor had his memories back, it was harder to leave him behind. But it was going to happen. There would be no last reprieve this time.

Angel stretched out on the bed and sighed. He tried to reason with himself that what he was doing was for the greater good and that Connor would live in a better world with the Circle destroyed. It was then that the image of Buffy came into his mind. Fighting for the greater good was all that she had known since she was fifteen years old and even she had been forced to put the world ahead of herself when she'd jumped off that scaffolding. Angel winced involuntarily. He would always be glad that he had not witnessed that moment although Buffy's telling of it had been graphic enough.

It was at that moment that he decided to call her. This was going to be his last day on Earth and he couldn't leave without saying goodbye. Angel sat up and leaned over to the get the phone from the bedside cabinet. Taking out a small, black book from the pocket of his coat which he had flung on to the end of the bed, he turned to Buffy's phone number in Rome. It seemed to be an unspoken rule between them that even though they did not speak for months, they always made sure they each had a number to call.

He started to dial the numbers and then hesitated. What was he going to say? _"Hi. I just_ _called to say that I'm gonna die tonight so uh, see ya! Have a nice life!"_ Angel shook his head and hung up the phone. There was nothing he could say. Any sign of an apocalypse and Buffy would be on the next plane to LA, wanting to either stop him or help him. Neither option was viable. Someone had to be left standing to fight the next wave of evil and Buffy was the best person to do that.

Realising that it was time to go, he slowly rose from the bed, put his coat back on and walked to his book shelf. Taking a novel from one of the shelves, he flicked to the back of the book. There, where he knew it would be, was his only photograph of Buffy. He looked at her eighteen year old face and her beautiful smile and then carefully placed the photo in his inside coat pocket.

Angel took one last look around the apartment and then opened the door to leave when suddenly the door pulled itself out of his grasp and slammed shut. A blast then threw him back on to the bed and as if it was all one movement, the telephone receiver jumped off the cradle and on to the night stand.

Taken by surprise, Angel looked first at the door and then at the phone, not knowing exactly what had happened. He replaced the phone then carefully stepped back on to the floor and walked to the door. Looking around him for anything suspicious, he re-opened the door only for it to do the same thing again and before he could react, he was catapulted back to the bed, the phone flung from its cradle once more. Angel tried to leave the room a further three times. On his sixth attempt, there was a white flash and then blackness.

***********

Buffy woke suddenly and sat bolt upright. She looked around frantically, trying to detect what had woken her but found nothing but a still darkness. A quick look at the clock told her it was five in the morning which was three hours before her alarm was due to go off. No alarm and no apparent source for her sitting wide awake in her bed meant only one thing: her slayer senses were tingling.

Buffy quietly stepped out of bed, walked to the window and pushed aside the blinds to survey the street outside. She saw the shape of a man creeping steadily towards the alleyway. Vampire. She would know the walk of a demon anywhere. Briefly, she wondered if he was watching the opposite apartment building, looking for someone arriving home late, unaware that their final few moments on this earth would be at the hands of a monster.

Knowing there was no time to lose, Buffy hurriedly dressed in a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a light jacket along with a pair of sneakers and headed towards the bedroom door. With her mind focussed on finding the vampire, she was unprepared for what happened next. The bedroom door ripped out of her grasp and slammed shut. Buffy tried over and over to get out of the bedroom but something was keeping her there. On her sixth attempt, she saw a white flash and then darkness overtook her.

************

A soft groan seemed to jolt Angel to his senses. Lying on the floor, he found himself in a dark room. As his eyes adjusted quickly to the darkness, he made out another figure lying a few feet away; a female. Even in the dark, he recognised her.

"Buffy?"

Sitting up and holding her shoulder, Buffy turned towards his voice and breathed a sigh of relief, "Angel?"

"Yeah. Are you hurt?"

Buffy shook her head, realising that while her eyes were still adjusting to the darkness, Angel could see her perfectly. "No, not really. I think I bruised my shoulder in the ... I want to say fall because it feels like I fell but where did I fall from? What happened?"

Angel frowned in concentration as he stood up. "I don't know. I think I fell too but it doesn't make sense. How could we have fallen from different places and end up here together?"

Buffy got to her feet, rotating her shoulder. "Beats me. One minute I was in bed, the next I'm waking up because I picked up the vibe of the vampire outside my building and then I ended up here."

Angel was glad Buffy couldn't see his faint blush. Thinking of Buffy in bed still gave him shivers of pleasure. "Er, you were in bed? I was too." Realising how lame that sounded, he hurried on, "I mean, I was lying down on top of my bed. You know, the bed was made. I wasn't _in_ the bed. The covers were underneath me ...." He trailed off knowing he was making it worse.

Buffy, who could now make out his shape in the dark, smiled and nodded in understanding. "You think it might be relevant? Us both being in bed. Sorry, me in, you on top?"

Angel almost choked. "_What?_ Oh well, yeah, I mean maybe."

Buffy continued to smile at the knowledge that she could still affect Angel and slowly walked towards him, treading carefully in the dark. "So, do you want to see if we can find our way out of here?"

"Sounds good".

Buffy and Angel discovered that the room was approximately twenty feet square with no windows or doors. The floor appeared to be wooden floorboards and there were no objects in the room for them to stumble over. It was simply an empty room.

The darkness did not abate but it appeared to grow less dense to the point where Angel and Buffy could see each other clearly in the dim light.

Angel quietly said, "I don't like this. We can't get out and yet somehow we got in. There is no-one here to keep us captive but ..."

"... there's no way to escape either" Buffy finished.

"Exactly. It's got to be magic that's keeping us here."

Buffy pondered this and replied, "Well, we could call Willow or Wesley and get them to magic us out of here. In fact, why didn't we think of using a cell phone before? Oh wait, I don't have mine with me. Do you have yours?"

Angel felt in his pocket and took out his cell phone. He showed the face to Buffy and she grimaced. No signal. Angel looked at his watch impatiently. It was eight-thirty; the time he had arranged to meet the gang. Pacing the floor, Angel tried desperately to think of a way out of the room.

Noting his agitation, Buffy eyed him carefully. After Angel had walked up and down the length of the room about five times, she spoke quietly. "Angel, where are you supposed to _be_?"

Her question startled him and before he could clear his expression, she read the meaning behind his worry. Something big was happening and he was supposed to be in the middle of it, not stuck in a weird room with her. He thought about lying to her but found that he couldn't. Instead, he felt compelled to fill her in on everything and he did so.

Buffy stared at Angel for a long time after he'd finished. So long that he thought she might have zoned out completely. Finally she spoke, "So, let me get this straight. You've discovered that no matter what we do, there will be evil all around us but to even up the score a little after your friend's soul was taken, you're going to take out this Crop Circle –"

"Circle of the Black Thorn" he corrected.

Buffy gave him a look that on another night may have killed him and then continued. "You're going to wipe out this _Circle of the Black Thorn, _even though they'll be replaced eventually by other demons. Doing so won't bring your friend back and there's a strong possibility that you'll rain hell on earth?"

Angel shifted uncomfortably. Buffy challenged him again. "Well? Am I right?"

Angel managed to keep his composure. He was not going to let Buffy talk him out of this. In a tone that Buffy recognised as verging on threatening, he softly said, "Look, I don't expect you to understand this but it is happening whether you like it or not."

"Well, I don't like it!" Buffy shouted, surprising Angel with the force of her anger. "It's as good as killing yourself! Do you think that will help? Do you think that the forces of evil are gonna say, 'Oh now that Angel has sacrificed himself we'll just leave those damn humans alone now' – do you?"

"I don't know! But what I do know is that killing the Circle will give the Senior Partners something to think about! I have to do something, Buffy! I have to do _something_ that will make it all worth it!"

Buffy and Angel were leaning towards one another now, faces distorted with anger and pain. She took a deep breath and stepped back. "Make what worth it, Angel? What?"

Angel physically sagged as he let the aggression go. "Fred's death. Buffy, her soul was ripped out of her. She's ... gone and I can't get her back. They made it happen. I have to do something to make up for her death. This is big. Really big. It may be the only chance we have to get at them before they close ranks and disappear."

He looked at her steadily, searching her face for understanding. "You've lost people, Buffy. You know how bad it can get. I have to make a difference."

Buffy walked over to him and took his hand. "Then let me fight with you." Angel shook his head, "No Buffy. If I fail, then someone will need to hold the line." He smiled crookedly, "Sorry to leave you with the clean up crew".

She looked up at him, slightly amused that he would seriously think she would stay behind. "You know you can't stop me" she said, smiling up at him.

Returning her smile, he replied, "I'll try though. Please Buffy, I was just thinking about calling you before I left but I knew you'd want to help. I –" He stopped and looked at her wonderingly.

Buffy frowned. "What?"

Angel released her hand and started pacing slowly again. Buffy grew impatient at his silence, "Enough with the pacing already! What is it?"

He stopped and turned to her. "I started dialling your number and then stopped because I knew you'd be on the first plane over. Then I tried to leave the room but the door kept closing and the phone jumped on to the table like ... like something wouldn't let me leave. Something wanted me to stay in that room and pick up the telephone ... what if I'd actually called you? What if you'd packed and tried to go to the airport? Would I have been able to leave the room?"

Buffy shook her head, trying to catch up. "Wait a second. You couldn't leave your room either? That happened to me. I was going to go after that vampire but I couldn't get out. The door kept closing on me. You think that if you had called me, you would have been able to leave the room and I would have been able to leave my room too? That we wouldn't have been brought here?"

Angel nodded. "That must be it. Something was making sure that we spoke to one another before I ... left. Even if they had to bring us to this room."

Realising that she could take advantage of Angel's thinking, Buffy replied quickly, "Exactly! Which means that no matter what, you would have told me about your plan and I would have been able to leave my room and _go to the_ _airport_. Angel, I was meant to join you in the fight."

Looking at her sadly, Angel shook his head. "No Buffy. I was calling you to say goodbye. Something or maybe someone wanted us to have the chance to say that."

He took her hand and with his free hand, gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. He leaned down towards her and spoke softly, "You know we can't do this together. Someone has to stay behind. You knew it when you jumped off that tower and you know it now. I don't want to leave you, Buffy but we both know I have to."

With tears forming in her eyes, Buffy stood on her toes and kissed him. He returned her kiss and for a few moments, they were lost to the feel and touch of each other.

Breaking the kiss, Buffy whispered, "I love you, Angel. Please let me fight with you. We stand a better chance together. Please."

Pain tore at Angel's heart and as he held her tight against him, he closed his eyes and breathed in the warm humanity of her; the mingled scents of shampoo and soap, the faint aroma of her perfume and the soft feel of her hair against his neck, committing the moment to a memory he would carry with him forever. "I love you too. I'll always be with you, Buffy. In your heart, I promise." Then he was kissing her again, passionately, knowing this would be the last chance he had to touch her.

And then it went black.

*************

Buffy woke with a start. The memories of what had happened with Angel in the mysterious room flooded back and for a moment, she thought it had been a dream. She jumped out of bed and hunted through her bag for her cell phone and it was then that she realised. She was fully dressed in jeans, t-shirt and sneakers. It hadn't been a dream.

Knowing she had to call Angel and tell him to stay put until she got there, she clicked to her contacts list to locate Angel's number. Suddenly, the apartment phone rang. Rushing to the phone, she picked it up hurriedly, almost dropping it. "Hello?"

"B, it's me."

Buffy frowned, "Faith? What are doing calling me at five in the morning?"

"Buffy, it isn't five in the morning there. Unless I got the time difference wrong. It should be something like nine o'clock."

Buffy swung round to her alarm clock. It read nine-fifteen. "It can't be," she whispered. "It wasn't four hours ago that I - Faith, look I'll have to call you back. Something urgent has come up, OK?"

"Buffy, wait! Something happened in Los Angeles. It's all over the news. They're calling it an earthquake or somethin' but I'm thinkin' it's a lot more than that, you know'? I think you should call Angel."

Buffy stared at the alarm clock, her mind slowly churning. It was nine-fifteen. Four hours since she'd seen him. How long had she been lying in her bed? Had Angel gone back to LA via the same magic which had returned her to Italy? Had he ...

"Buffy! Are you there?"

Buffy snapped her attention back to Faith. "Yes, I'm here Faith. I'll call him," she said mechanically. "I'm sure he's fine".

Faith paused before replying, "OK, but you'll call me if something happens, you know, if we need to get down there?"

"Yeah, I'll call you. Bye Faith." Buffy replaced the phone and slowly went to the television in the living room. In what felt like a trance, she turned on the set and switched to the world news station.

Like a scene from a horror movie, what was left of LA was being shown in all its terrible glory, dented only by the grim news reporter standing to one side of the screen. He spoke reverently, _"It is still unknown just how many people died in what is believed to be an unprecedented earthquake and it may take weeks to get an accurate number. As you can see behind me, buildings have been shattered or completely destroyed and ....."_

Buffy selected Angel's number from the list and pressed 'Call'. Her heart jumped when his phone responded after five rings, "This is Angel. I can't take your call right now but please leave a message and I'll get back to you."

Buffy hung up the phone and turned off the television. Sitting down on the sofa, she tried to stop the tears but they began to trickle down her face unaided. Something – the Powers That Be? – had foreseen Angel's death but for some reason had made sure that she and Angel had said goodbye. Why? He would never have changed his mind no matter what she had said, so why? Perhaps so that they could say they loved one another. Perhaps so that neither of them could forget.

With the thought, "I'll never forget" running over and over in her mind, Buffy curled up in a ball and sobbed.

THE END


End file.
